Be The Plot Twist

Its been a while guys. 3 weeks to be exact. Lets just say, things in life took a step backward, then a couple sideways, but now they’re power-walking forwards again at a rate of knots. So here I am!

This week, I’ve started writing again. I don’t mean writing blog posts, I mean writing my books. And I can tell you, I’m excited about it. But today, I needed to focus on this. Focus on you guys.

So, here we go!

Movie Makeover Montages. That’s what I’m thinking about tonight.  

When I was younger, I was OBSESSED with Grease. (I reckon I can thank my mum for that one.) The wholesome good girl meets brooding bad boy and they fall in love. *Sigh*. Oh and don’t even get me started on that glow up! The amount of times (even as an adult) I’ve stomped round my room in a pair of black leggings and a vest top hanging off my shoulders, stomping my imaginary ciggie into the ground… ‘Tell me about it… Stud’. YAS QUEEN! Sandy, you beautiful specimen of what god can make! You go get your man! Anyway, back to the matter at hand. For me, the first time I saw that film, I was Sandra Dee in all her virginal glory. Watching her transform from angelic little goody two-shoes into an absolute vixen, was mesmorizing and inspiring. My heart broke when the world lost the icon that is Olivia Newton John. Rest in peace. 

Then came Grease 2. And that’s where I developed an unhealthy obsession with Bikers in leather jackets, and plant anatomy (If you know, you know). But still, the good boy meets the bad girl and turns into a badass biker and she loves him. Maxwell Caulfield was pretty damn sexy as a biker though right? I think he’s old enough to be my Dad now, but never mind.   

Then later in life, came Pretty Woman. Julia Roberts. Just wow. A stunning lady of the night, meets the snobby businessman, has a makeover and POW! He loves her.  

Then The Princess Diaries. Mia Thermopolis has the makeover of all makeovers, becomes a beautiful princess, and suddenly she’s desirable. 

Then She’s All That… They take the pretty, glasses wearing, nerdy girl… wash her hair, take her glasses off, put her in a dress and… Ta Daaa! She’s suddenly beautiful. 

So in essence, all my ideas of needing a makeover to attract my dream man, originated with Grease… Right? 

Wrong.  

There’s one other film, that I remember watching as a toddler, which started my unhealthy obsession with becoming what a man desires.  

A woman who is constantly overlooked, because of her ragged maid-like appearance. Who undergoes a makeover, puts on a pretty dress, hops into a pumpkin… I mean carriage… and meets her Prince Charming at a ball, then disappears into the abyss when the clock strikes midnight. And the only reason she gets a look in again, is because she left one single sparkly shoe on the stairs… Sound familiar? Yes, that’s right. Cinderella.  

But looking back on these feel-good montages… I see something now, that I never saw before. These women didn’t change who they were. They didn’t change their entire personality to lure in their men. They simply enhanced their already-there beauty, which in turn, gave them the confidence they needed to do whatever it was that they wanted to do.  

Sandy was still Sandy, just with sexy ass hair and the killer confidence to get her man. Mia was still Mia, just with sexy ass hair and the confidence to hold herself like a Princess. Cinderella was still Cinderella, just in a beautiful dress and the dirt washed off her face, with the confidence of a Queen… and sexy ass hair. (I’m joking… Sort of…) 

And this brings me to my first order of business.  

My Glow-Up. MY Movie Makeover Moment.

Now, I don’t want to ‘enhance my natural beauty’ to simply lure in a man. I want to build up my own confidence. I want to feel good in my own skin. But how? 

Well first, I want to get in shape. I don’t mean skinny, I mean comfortable. I want to be able to run around with my kids playing football at the park, without needing a timeout after 2 minutes to catch my breath. I want to look at myself in pictures with pride, instead of hiding behind other people. This one, I’ve already sort of started. I reached out to a PT on Tiktok, by the name of Paul Andrews, who is the founder of The ReDefine Academy. The reason I picked him was two-fold and both reasons were pretty simple.

1. PT’s come in a range of shapes and sizes. I can’t imagine sitting and watching videos of some chavvy guy, or listening to Bubblegum Barbie. I need someone I can relate to in some sort of way, in order to see myself putting in the work. Enter Paul. Tattoos, beard, swears like a sailor AND interviewed Punk Rock Factory (which if you know me and my eldest, is a huge thing!).
2. When I interacted with him on his Tiktok live, he responded and gave me advice. Not just generic BS, but actual advice that I could take away and use by myself. He wasn’t getting anything out of that interaction at that time, he just did it because that’s what he does.

All of the above = best PT for the job. (Unless someone can point me in the direction of a PT who can satisfy my praise kink whilst I do squats? No? Damn.)

ANYWAY… So the plan, is to utilise his videos and information from his website, whilst saving up to join the Pro plan with The ReDefine Academy. Simple.

Then I want to improve my skin. Its not even that bad, I’m pretty lucky on that front. But it could be better. I’ve never had a skin routine, not since I was a teenager and I had every Clearasil product that Boots stocked. But I think its time to start. So I’ve got myself some products from Superdrug. A cleanser, moisturizer, face cream and eye cream (for these bloody wrinkles, cos crows feet ain’t it.)

Then, I want to change up my style. Right now, I have no idea what my style could be described as. I have more pairs of black leggings than my local Matalan, that’s for certain. And they are usually paired with a hoody or an oversized band t-shirt. And that’s it… So I need clothes that still feel like me, but better. Cue trip to Next!

And last but not least, the staple to every famous movie makeover montage… The sexy ass hair. My hair has been blonde, light brown, dark brown, red, bleached, and natural. I’ve had bobs (never again), layers, undercuts, money pieces, curtain bangs, block fringes, highlights, lowlights, ombre… You name it, I’ve probably tried it. But now, at the grand old age of 33, its just dead. No lift, no life, no love. To the Salon! 

So without further adieu, it is here, that I begin my transformation from hairy little caterpillar, to beautiful butterfly (or moth… we shall see).  

Gym membership: Check. 

Skin care products: Check. 

Something other than black leggings: Check. 

Stock photo of a woman with sexy-ass hair: Check.  

Lets do this. Lets switch up the narrative, rewrite the script, and be the plot twist. 

Love ya! X